There's
no getting away from the moribund grip of nostalgia. In fact I am
returning its mephitic squeeze this time by staggering about a mile
up the hill to our local branch of Nicolas Wines to see what they've
got on offer. Why? Because I have been seized by a horrible
ungovernable
nostalgic yearning: Nicolas was the first wine I can remember
consuming at home, with my parents, in a domestic context. The first
wine that, so far as I was concerned, ever made it through the front
door of our house. Why go back to it now? I have no idea.
At
any rate, the significance of Nicolas decades ago was less to do with
the taste (I must have been about seven when it first appeared, so
had to drink it adulterated with tapwater, and it couldn't have
tasted worse if it had been adulterated with Gloy Gum; slightly less
terrible in fact, as Gloy wasn't bad if what you wanted was a quick
adhesive rush) and more to do with the change it provoked in the
atmosphere around the table. At the time, Nicolas spent big on
advertising in the colour supplements, showing a little three-wheeler
delivery van plying the streets of Paris, bringing Nicolas to every
address, much as the Unigate Dairy brought two pints of milk to
suburban London; only this was a couple of litres of bright,
serviceable wine, and Nicolas was its name, and it was, if you
believed the copy, the wine the whole of France thrived on.
So
my father bought some, and it came in these shapely yet
modestly-adorned bottles with foil seals (like the foil on the tops
of the innocent milk bottles) and little plastic stubs for stoppers.
The first one was opened and placed carefully on the sideboard, like
a loaded cannon, while we ate our Sunday roast. The effect was
immediate. Up to that point, my Father had tended to drink beer with
his lunch (beer from a freaking great brown bottle with a
screw-shaped rubber bung, I might add) while my Mother inhaled a gin
& tonic. Now, though, we had an emissary from the great
wine-making continent of Europe in the room and suddenly, by
association, we were at once more sophisticated, more civilised than
we had ever been before, even allowing for the presence of my
Mother's gravy and sprouts. After that, we never looked back. We
started taking our holidays abroad and my Father grew some rather
defensive sideburns. We became worldly.
So
this is the legacy of Nicolas. Years have (of course) passed since those
interminable Sunday lunches and Nicolas, which started out in Paris
in 1822, has itself been through a few changes - especially in this
country, where the Nicolas chain of shops recently acquired a new,
UK-based owner in the form of Spirited Wines. The original link with
France has thus been formally broken, although the shops still bear (for now, at least) the branding and the clarety paintwork of the last century, and seem much like any other pleasant, fast-disappearing, off-licence .
What
they don't have, and haven't had for ages, are Nicolas branded wines,
least of all in the big, artisanal bottles of childhood memory.
Instead, they have a bargain line called Les
Petites Récoltes,
going for £5.80
a bottle (£5.80 apparently being the new £5.00)
which cuts, effectively, the crap, offering everyday drinking at a
just about semi-sensible price.
Very
well. I buy a bottle of the Vin
de Pays de la Cité de Carcassonne
and take it home and open it and drink a bit and in no sense is it
offering any competition to your user-friendly New World cornershop
wines, being instead furious with acidity and alcohol and also a (not
unpleasant) taste of burning leaves. This is a wine which is good
with game, saltpetre or molten lead, not a wine to savour, PK-style,
for its own sake. I write down the words almost
depraved
at one stage, before corking the stuff up and having a lie-down.
But
I have to come back to it. I don't know why, but there is something
perversely charming about this stuff. It doesn't taste like anything
commonplace or even expected (turns out it contains every grape known
to man, Carignan, Grenache, Cinsault, Cabernet-Sauvignon, Merlot), it
makes no compromises at all, but what it does do, magically, is
suggest some kind of awful barbarous old-school vin
de table,
the sort mythically offered at out-the-way rural eateries that
everyone except me has managed to find somewhere in France, where the
menu is what the patron
decides to stick on a plate in front of you and where the drink is
unlabelled and unknowable and borderline undrinkable, and yet
satisfying somehow, and actually quite potable when taken with some
(nice, greasy) food, the whole combining into a complete and exotic
taste experience.
Cunning
marketing has much to do with this in the case of Les
Petites Récoltes. The bottles are made of no-frills clear glass, there's
almost no labelling, and what labelling there is, is confined to two
tiny scraps of coloured paper covered in twirly French handwriting -
a rusticity which I'm sure was dreamed up in a chrome-filled office
in La
Défense,
but which does the job for me, almost too potently. It creates such a
genial mood of misty retrospection, a real Nicolas feeling, that not
only do I put up with the bottle's persistently dribbly neck, I
welcome it as a confirmation of its rough'n'ready unpretentiousness,
just as I welcome its rough'n'ready contents. Just like the old
Nicolas, it is selling me a dream of France in the comfort of my
surburban home.
Am
I a mug? Certainly. But it's as much fun as I've had with a bottle of wine
for a long time. And when I can pluck up the courage, I shall drink
the bottle of white - a Les
Petites Récoltes Vin de Pays d'Aigues
- which I bought at the same time as the red, and go down fighting.
CJ
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